In the face of the beautiful-awful-tragic-absurd-mundane-heartbreaking-impossible-wonderful,
all I can think to say is:
and even this...
“I record my life, sifting and trying to separate what is real from what I’ve dreamed. I have decided not to tell you what is fact versus what is unfact primarily because (a) I am giving you a portrait of the essence of me, and (b) because, living where I do, living in the chasm that cuts through thought, it is lonely… come with me, reader. I am toying with you, yes, but for a real reason. I am asking you to enter the confusion with me, to give up the ground with me, because sometimes that frightening floaty place is really the truest of all. Kierkegaard says, 'The greatest lie of all is the feeling of firmness beneath our feet. We are most honest when we are lost.' Enter that lostness with me. Live in the place I am, where the view is murky, where the connecting bridges and orienting maps have been surgically stripped away.”
— Lauren Slater
“I want to be remembered as the girl who always smiles even when her heart is broken, and the one that could always brighten up your day even if she couldn’t brighten her own.”
AIM: andeventhis
Email: andeventhis[at]aim[dot]com
Today I realized that no matter what, I will always love you. You will always be my first love, real true love, and you will always set the standards for everyone else I am ever with.
I’m not going to try to control my thoughts anymore, I’m just going to accept that living with thoughts of you and us and our somehow failed relationship is how my life will be. And I will try my hardest to not think about you not thinking about me.
This one made me sad, just to know that I’m not the only one, and that there’s probably more of us out there.
Every. Fucking. Word.
Every. Fucking. Word.
This one made me sad, just to know...the only one, and