And even this...

I'm single. I want to help Kristen Stewart. I go by Sydney Jaded. You may call me either.
Or just SJ.
Broken brain. Fractured heart. Killer smile. Wicked sense of humor.

In the face of the beautiful-awful-tragic-absurd-mundane-heartbreaking-impossible-wonderful,
all I can think to say is:
and even this...

“I record my life, sifting and trying to separate what is real from what I’ve dreamed. I have decided not to tell you what is fact versus what is unfact primarily because (a) I am giving you a portrait of the essence of me, and (b) because, living where I do, living in the chasm that cuts through thought, it is lonely… come with me, reader. I am toying with you, yes, but for a real reason. I am asking you to enter the confusion with me, to give up the ground with me, because sometimes that frightening floaty place is really the truest of all. Kierkegaard says, 'The greatest lie of all is the feeling of firmness beneath our feet. We are most honest when we are lost.' Enter that lostness with me. Live in the place I am, where the view is murky, where the connecting bridges and orienting maps have been surgically stripped away.”
— Lauren Slater

“I want to be remembered as the girl who always smiles even when her heart is broken, and the one that could always brighten up your day even if she couldn’t brighten her own.”

AIM: andeventhis
Email: andeventhis[at]aim[dot]com

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ramblingsofanurbanjawn:

kidkoni:

fyeahwomenshistory:

[TW: racism, abuse, sexual abuse]

pixyled:

esmeweatherwax:

racemash:

thespunkywallflower:

J. Marion Sims is called “the Father of Gynecology” due to his experiments on enslaved women in Alabama who were often submitted as guinea pigs by their plantation owners who could not use them for sexual pleasure.

He kept seven women as subjects for four years, but left a trail of death and permanently traumatized black women.

Anarcha was one of the women Sims experimented upon. A detailed history of this monster is in Harriet Washington’s book, Medical Apartheid.

Sims believed that Africans were numb to pain and operated on the women without anesthesia or antiseptic. The procedures usually happened this way.

Black female slaves who were guinea pigs would hold one subject down as Sims performed hysterectomies, tubal ligation, and other procedures to examine various female disorders.

Sims also performed a host of operations on other slave populations. The following excerpt details his “practice” on enslaved infants.

Sims began to exercise his freedom to experiment on his captives. He took custody of slave infants and, with a shoemaker’s awl, tried to pry the bones of their skulls into proper alignment.

You guys should really google him.

(if you click the link, I did it for you)

fucking hell I just nearly got sick.

tumblrs tuaght me so much
I had NO IDEA how SO MANY THINGS we have in modern days was LITERALLY made at the expense of black women. The fact that they skip over this in things like biology classes and stuff like that is disgusting.

This is just

apalling

I’m disgusted. Anesthesia was available and he didn’t use it because he thought African women were “numb” to pain? Fuck him. Also I read he invented the speculum, so fuck him twice.

Thank you for posting this. I had no idea.

Jesus. I’m afraid to click that google link.

And seriously….only a fucking monster could invent the speculum. He is definitely sitting on a throne made of fire in hell right now.